*ron weasley voice* viktor krum?? nah what a jerk what a— [trips] [hundreds of photos of viktor krum spill out of jacket] w-what a fuckign asshole i these arent mine im just [gathering them up frantically sweating] listen i just listen fuck [thousands of pictures of viktor krum scatter across the floor] shit fcuk im holding them for a friend just listen
A human getting pissed at their vampire boyfriend so they put in a silver sterling tongue stud and bracelets and earrings and their vampire boyfriend is just standing five feet away like “babe. c’mon.”
Vampire: “The fair is in town, maybe a date will help…”
human spends the whole time in the hall of mirrors
WE HAVE A NEW WINNER.